That little blurb in November was a sign. I "stopped" blogging when I returned from the Philippines last spring because, well, I was back in the mundane lifestyle filled with events that are unnecessary to chronicle. Right? No need to continue this. There's nothing exciting happening in my life, nothing worth sharing with the general populace, or at least the handful of people who know this blog exists.
But then I found myself in November publishing a post that demonstrated no exciting event in my life. Just me, processing. Why did I do that?
I've been doing a lot of thinking lately, and when I think, it helps me to write out my thought process and the conclusions that crop up along the way. And when I know there is a possibility that someone else can see what I've written, I'm held accountable to my thoughts and I (sometimes) receive feedback and new insight from others. Also, perhaps the biggest of my reasons, I know I need to write to fully acknowledge and work out the thoughts that are residing in my head, and having outside influence to keep me committed to writing on a regular basis is quite helpful. That's where the blog comes into play. Your existence and the knowledge of the possibility that you might read this help me to continue processing life well. Thank you.
So after several months of occasionally remembering to consider starting up writing again, I'm back. And why now? I've recently arrived at a new perspective on this time in my life. Upon returning to Walla Walla last fall, I picked up the concept of the next three years resembling a holding cell. Yes, I would learn valuable information along the way, but essentially it would just be the last stage before the REAL stuff started happening. Work through three years of school, and then enter into the adventure.
Not a good perspective.
I've got to stop putting my life into segments. Now is part of next. The more I engage in life and plans and preparations and work and growth now means that I will not only experience a more fulfilled time in college, but I will also be assisting my future self to be even more the person I want to be.
So what does this look like? I've started to learn French (beyond the high school classes). I've begun looking into internships, grad school programs, and mission and humanitarian organizations. I've begun to cut down on noise and increase my reflection and God time. I've resumed writing. I'm letting myself think and feel and listen more.
So, I'm back. You don't have to read my posts. But the point of the matter is that they will be coming, available for you to enjoy or disregard. This is my life right now, and I'm going to continue to ponder it.